Fixer-Upper

...This is it!!

I wanna buy my first house!! I have one in mind. It's a fixer-upper, but not so fixer-upper that I can't live in it. I love the house but I need some money for the down payment. I need 16,000 bucks. I'm talking to all the people I know who might have it and might want to help. I'm offering a 20% return on a minimum of 1,000 investment. This is guaranteed folks!! And I won't take your money till I raise the entire amount. So, please, help a cancer-girl out and tell me you'll invest.

It's 20% per year. So for every year I keep your money, you get an additional 20% back on it. (Side note on this, I only plan to own the home for 6 mos. to 2 years - I'm putting it on the market 6 mos after I get it, and I figure it'll sell within a year from there.)