Right now, this moment I feel all at the same time like I want to cry; curl into a ball on the floor and rock; scream and throw heavy objects; or have really heavy sex. I don't feel at all calm. Anxiety is high and it doesn't feel like I have any time to rest. It's like time is going in fast-forward and the controller is broken so I can't switch it back.
For the last few days I've been scratching at nothing on my face. I have what looks like a rash across my forehead. I want to cry but I can't seem to do it. I feel it burning behind my eyes but it doesn't come out.
On Sunday my ex asked me if I might want to be his roomate after the shop shuts down in October. I told him I'd think about it.
It's a good thing that tomorrow is Friday. I'm not sure that I could handle much more of this. Each day that passes brings me closer to the end of all of this tumultuous moving and shaking. I'll then resume some sort of normalcy and get back to life.
I'm watching a show on string theory now. It's much calmer than the creepy old people. It's actually making me feel much better than I was before. I wish that I could watch science stuff all the time.
I need to know more!!! Gimme more string theory! I should have been a science major.
I'm going to finish watching this now. Good-nite